As someone who lives in the region, I know what it’s like to ride the cobbles. Flat, it’s hard; uphill, it’s brutal. I also understand that not everyone has the luck to live nearby or the luxury to make the trip and experience it for themselves. It’s not so easy to describe what it’s like, so I will do it in the form of music, something we know all over the world. My choice for which hill to describe is “De Koppenberg,” in my opinion, the hardest of them all.

There you are, finally at the bottom of the famous climb. The cobbles start right away; this is the disco part. Ain’t no stopping us now! Only Le Freaks start this hill on a race bike. You should be dancing on the cobbles. You shout to your mate(s), “Race to the top; winner takes it all!”

It starts to get steeper. It starts to hurt. You shift back, turn up the cadence to keep your speed. This is the ’90s dance part. It’s time to pump up the jam. Even if you’re a wannabe, you believe you’re going to make it. So much emotion, a sandstorm in your head. Should I shift back? One more time. Keep spinning the pedals, boom, boom, boom.

Where the trees start is the steepest part, above 20%. Your speed drops far below 10km/h; it’s time to find that smallest gear. Stay upright and hope not to skid. This is chaos, experimental. This is the new wave section. Into the trees, lost in a forest. Our darkness, still, there is a light that never goes out. Yet for many of us, this is our happy house; we’re happy here. But it’s tainted love, an obsession. And if you skid, fall, or have to stop for any reason, there is no way of starting again. You’ll be running up that hill.

If you survive the steepest section, it’s still steep; it’s still far. Your cadence is very slow, and every cobble hits you like a hard rock. You’re out of strength, and you bang your head up and down along with your pedal strokes. This lasts way longer than it should. The rock section. Welcome to the jungle. You’re having a personality crisis; this is a madhouse. Why do you do this? You must be stone cold crazy, a basket case. <LONG GRUNT> You’re the trooper; get to the top; nothing else matters.

At the top, there is a child walking with his parents. He stops in his tracks as he turns and looks at you. His eyes are full of admiration. “This guy made it! Mommy, look! One day, I’ll be riding up De Koppenberg just like him! He’s my hero!”